#23412

Hey lovely folks!

I hope this finds you well. Spring is upon us and I’m getting things figured out. I actually had a sincere smile on my face yesterday taking a little walk with Galixy riding the bike.

Firstl

I want to touch on my probation. We had a home visit and that went well. I’ve had a paperwork meeting and yesterday was a risk assessment which I’m still considered low risk. Next appointment is in a month, and the monthly supervision fee. Started volunteering at Habitat for humanity and my therapists ranch. Called court and my fines are at 2.7k since they took the grande from my bail towards my penalties.

I did 3 hours at the Habitat for Humanity and got to vacuum and price some items. I even got fed. Amazingly kind people.

I also did 3 hours at the ranch breaking ice and pumping water after getting a little tour of the amazing area.

There’s lots to do and I love being busy. I downloaded an app to help me with my self care and it’s really been helping. I’ve been meditating so much and journaling…. I took the kids to the library and found myself a book aout Chanting. It’s very interesting and I’ve listened to some songs by the author’s group but I haven’t found my chant yet.

I’ve also been doing my yoga teacher training moved into sequencing classes at about 56% or so. I thought I disliked poses but sequencing is it’s own can of worms. I’ll get the hang of it but it’s just such a jump into intuitive structure…. and then writing it down… and preparing it to be taught. ooooof. apprehensions and hard but I’m determined.

Next week I get to “start work” which we’ll see how that goes. I’m super excited, don’t get me wrong on the word choice. I’m worried about the number of hours being enough for probation. So far I’m scooting by so I don’t think there’ll be a problem. I think it’s beyond amazing I get to work for and with cool people that won’t take advantage of my time but will even be understanding with the kids. I’m especially happy that it went from first day learning at a festival but rather at the house prespinning cotton candy and filling out paper work. Like I don’t think I can’t get the hang of it but I definitely prefer less pressure, though I was looking forward to going to Missoula.

I’m really just being present and trying to do good things. Make the best out of this time. Thoughts of rebuilding the kids bunk beds so we can take Matilda on trips over summer vacation. Especially to lakes and things with our paddleboard.

I’m also trying to build myself something to expand my living space here. I need a wood burning stove so I can keep the area warm enough for the kids so we can have our own space, too.

I miss my life so much…. I know I need to reformat that because this is still my life. I just miss how it used to be. Just one year ago everything was looking so bright. It’s not looking as dim as it did last  fall. It’s really been a hard time and I don’t know how I’m gonna make it through next winter. But that’s future Laney’s problem. I figure I’ll just acquire enough crafting materials on the side to occupy the times of dark.

Which reminds me, I totally made a thing.

I really haven’t taken many pictures lately. I was just trying to see…  But I do think this thing turned out nicely. 

In my down time I’ve done  some sudoku and gone to the river and played my ukulele. Like I’ve said I’m trying to keep busy. Like I’m trying to prepare mysef to do better when I do get out of this situation. Something’s gonna come from it. I’m still processing not having Caleb in my life anymore… it hurts.

Ok! I really don’t know what else to talk about. I’m just so happy for the warmth and sun. SO grateful.

Imma eat some reese’s pieces and cuddle up with Rhea now. Then read a little. This weekend I gotta haul a tree to the burn pit (and to the fire pit!)  and help my mom build some garden beds. It’ll be a nice weekend and I hope Catie feels better so I can see her soon.

I hope y’all are grateful.

Many blessings to y’all