Good morning! The sun is shining brilliantly through the crisp cold air of encroaching fall. The general bite the air in Montana gets is returning. I feel blessed that there was enough summer here to have warm some nights.
Matilda is mostly put back together and the kids’ trailer is way more organized. It also has a new door handle so the kids can actually be safe in their room. Not just cat leashed locking the door. Yup, that was risky for months, but I didn’t feel like I should advertise that situation as it was happening for security. Stupid enough leaving my children in a trailer that doesn’t lock, even more stupid if you tell the whole world. So this is the reminder to take whatever is on the internet with a grain of salt. It’s never as good as it looks and it’s probably worse than advertised.
That trailer is literally falling apart at the seams, so if the door is locked, one could probably just wiggle a finger under a seem and the thing will collapse. I haven’t found a replacement.
On that note, Matilda and I are driving to Billings to have Hanser automotive look at her and her mechanical issues on sept. 7th……
I’m pretty nervous about this appointment because it’ll give me a clue on what steps will possibly be coming. I’ve been tentatively looking but everything seems so far out of reach right now……
Especially as my new cute set up seems like it’s very managable the way it is. The electric water pump is missing some pieces, but I definitely gave it a try to set up. Just a couple steps away from having running water.
The kids’ have been spending some good time with their Omi this year, going to the farmers market, helping out with the Alpacas, and even going on a Gateway of Mountains boat cruise. We also went to Digger days which is a yearly event of bulldozers, excavators, cranes, etc. Food and info stands for kids to explore. Opi and Nana took them to a car show to hang out which the kids loved. Here and there I’ve been getting some small breaks. I am still hoping to get some actual days just for myself. By myself. A time to wonder what I should do with myself. And actually listen to what I want through the babble.
Maybe it’d tell me where life is taking us from here, too.
A couple days ago, Mauve, the cat, brought a robin into the bus. I found her sitting next to the bird which had some wounds on it’s back. I grabbed the bird and brought it in, where we watched it over night. Personally, I wouldn’t have let it out as soon as we did, but that decision wasn’t left for me. My kids were told not to be going in and out too much so that the Klaus cat wouldn’t have a chance of getting Ms. birb. Do my children listen? They’re children, so if they listened, they forgot. Klaus got out. I couldn’t keep an eye on that situation after that. It wasn’t my situation anymore, no matter how much I wish I could’ve saved that bird…. My cat has a bell on her collar and a lot of cat toys. I would like her to be less predatory. It would definitely be easier on traveling too if she’d just stay inside…….
We attended a friends’ birthday party that was at the trampoline place. The kids had tons of fun. I was really happy to be there, though my awkwardness lives on and through. Wonder how many people see me as painfully awkward vs. the “scorpio mysterium.” I definitely wish I’d made plans with people towards the end instead of “rushing off” feel even more awkward trying to go “hey! when do you have time for me?” when I don’t even know when I have time for me. It’s much easier for me to just be kidnapped into plans. Oof those couple sentences are making me feel choked up. So better get back to the happiness my kids’ had jumping on the trampolines. Playing with Gabriel and his friends. They had Pizza and cupcakes! My kiddos were super stoked for purchasing and giving birthday gifts. I feel very lucky to even be known by this warm family of Williams’…. and then to be invited to things.
What else to report? As the morning goes on, the kids are playing in bed. I still have to go to the department of education to file the intent to homeschool for the upcoming year. We saw the doctors. Atreyu’s fit as a fiddle whilst Galixy is going to get a tooth crowned, but if that’s the worst, we can consider Galixy just as fit.
I had my dental surgery repeat. Last year, I wasn’t smoking and followed post op procedure to a T. My body decided to reject it all. This year, I even warned the dental assistant that I would be disregarding the majority of the post op procedures. She looked worried for a bit, rightfully so.. I woulda felt worried, too, but I bet that it’d do better than last year. So instead of antibiotics I used clove oil. I took a couple pain pills to lessen the intense throb to just an irritant. Swelling was down in no time. part of the stitch loosened and dangled at one point, but I’m back to normal. Last year really was a sh*tshow through and through. Exemplified by my teeth debacle. Affirmed by the fact of friends list cleaning itself out…..
Now the kids are up and in Omi’s house, so maybe I should go check that they’re eating breakfast and not nuisancing.
I genuinely hope Matilda’s fix will be managable, but uncertain future looms.
I also sincerely hope your life is rolling smoothly . I hope you share a smile and have a gratitude in your heart. I hope you feel seen, heard, and loved.
Many blessings onto your path. So each stumble is into a pot of gold, or whatever you value.
Loving you!
Matilda the Bugus 