Today was a rough day for my transmission. Apparently its using more fluid than usual so I need to keep a closer eye on it. At least the struggle let a new friend I’d met in Belgrade find me. This guy’s vibe is one super similar to a few other awesome individuals I’ve met and chived with.

Wednesday night I drove into bozeman and spent the night at Walmart. I had some friendly talks, but all in all I only made a dollar. So we spent some time at the Dinosaur Park, playing and swimming. I got contacted about Matilda by a nice guy who checked her out.

Last night Saliha arrived at the airport with her baby. I’m so happy they are here and I stayed up late socializing and somewhat processing.

I had a terrible night sleep, but once again woke at 7:30 with no room for more sleep. Maybe the tiredness is cause for my feeling of being lost today. Maybe it’s that the short drive we took was very hard and I know my transmission isn’t happy at all. I should currently be parked near the gas station or something.

It is Crikett’s birthday today, and I completely ruined the gift I had been working on. Those projects have been the reason I put down my wrapping kit for the last while. It just hasn’t felt right. And now I have no gift for my friend. 😦 Also, there is a big dinner with all their family here and I’ve become overwhelmed. One of Crikett’s niece’s is so taken by bugus that she tried to do my dishes and flooded our floor. I really appreciate her initiative. Right now she’s taking the boys for walks and telling them stories to scare them into behaving. I’m not much of a fan of such a method, but I will have the chance to talk to my boys later. She’s only nine and her view of raising kids is gonna change multiple more times.

There’s so many people inside and I feel awkward joining something like that. I feel misplaced and blocked in. Even if this truck didn’t block me in, I would feel like I couldn’t leave here without going in and saying something. and then I’d just be inside already.

So, the scary stories include an owl that brings bad presents and good presents for easter. I’ve been charged to keep tally of their good and bad behavior because it’s like a competition between them. I don’t know. I’m just here right now.

Last night the kids went to bed kinda late. Crikett ended up coming to check on me and being supportive and coaxing. It wasn’t all that many people there and after the boys went to bed, I actually got some adult time. It was nice and my bedtime still came at a reasonable hour. I even got inspired to write about people instead of just finishing this post. This morning, I slept in and Galixy only got up when I did. Then we did some morning things and headed to the potatoe festival. I drove the bus in an attempt to get a good spot for flying a “need transmission” in bugus’ window while we went to the parade. Crikett, Saliha, Sam and the kids walked so I didn’t locate them for the long parade.

That parade was super taxing on me. Being there for both kids all by myself with so many other kids around and then wandering through the crowd to find the group later. All the stands and fun things. When we finally found them, I was close to tears. Who am I kidding, I’m still leaking. I feel so bad. I love these kids so much but I’m so tired. Crikett grabbed them and sent me off.

I’m at my bus in the middle of a car crowded field. Rhea is out and chikkie is on a leash. I just had my first interaction as I’m wiping away tears and sniffling. Oh shame is me. Full disclosure, Have had my period for a minute now, and this shit is making me weepy. I am grateful because it’s showing me my true exhaustion and my big need.

So here I am. A guy and his son living in an astro van, slowly building on his bus just stopped by. Loved bugus. I can be proud of it’s interior now, it’s so beautiful. I should take this chance of freedom and clean and make aa video for you all! It would be a great pleasure to let you see my home as it is now..

I’ll jump right on that!!

Loving you!!