Today was not my day. From front to back nothing but blood and tears. I could go on a long litany of all the dumb bullshit I went through, but I dont want to have that negative focus. I’ll try this instead. I could’ve used a kid dentist today and a better reason to drive across town. It would’ve been beneficial if the kids knew their own limits better. I could’ve used my phone for inquiries more throughout the day. I really shoulda cleaned the bus and just holed up in it all day. But that didn’t happen.
What did happen is that a wonderful lady at the herb shop helped me out a great deal with spilanthe. More so than her job required her to do. She was absolutely the light in today.
Throughout my gray day was plenty of supportiveness. It just seemed that if something wasnt spilling, one would bleed profusely from bumping his nose or the other was complaining about his teeth hurting. The helplessness abides. For real though, I’m gushing vehemently out of lower orafices so I’m feeling weak to begin with. That migraine the other day was a big predicator of the impending emotional ride and physical discomfort.
So now, I’m parked at Denny’s because I really had a craving, but see the title?? FML. I decided, after eating mozzarella stick grilled cheese, I was not even gonna move a parking spot in this lot. Galixy fell asleep on the way over so Atreyu and I went in to order just the two of us. We played tictactoe while waiting for the food and watching the bus.
Tomorrow I want to do nothing. Check out the goodwill in this lot, plop down at a playground, see some sunshine, read a book… on Monday I will hope the gem show wont be so busy so I can walk about a minute. On Tuesday I’m gonna head east.
I’ve thought about it and decided that I dont want to go to the rainbow gathering after all. It’s supposed to be cold and rainy. I have things I need to take care of and they dont necessarily involve observing a bunch of hippies. I do love going to the Woods and socializing… differently? The constructs are different. It’s a culture. Very entertaining to observe. The perspective is enriching.
As any culture, we’ve subcultured. There’s a wide array of different rainbow culture you could fit in to. I dont even want to get into it cause it could get political. Not everything is politics. But everything has politics and rules vary but they become social constructs and I abstain from it as much as possible. True I have my opinion but I like to do with those as I do with farts: hold them in forever, let them form and then watch them float away with the wind.
Just like bad days. They’re there. They get lived through and then they float away, too. Never mind that its February and we’re breathing through this month.
Next step is to find chocolate and a movie and to curl up and disappear for the rest of the day.
Loving you!
Matilda the Bugus 